Robbed

"Maggie, where is my iPod?"

I searched my fuzzy Monday morning brain.  Aaron was driving to his appointment, talking to me on the car speakers that normally blast his playlist.  We keep the iPod in the center console.  Why would I take it out?  Wait, did I take it out?

"... The car was open and I know I didn't leave it open.  I wasn't going to mention it, but I can't find my iPod anywhere."

Ohhhhhhh CRAP...

Someone stole the iPod out of our car in the middle of the night.  The van was also unlocked, the glove compartment was open, and some papers had been gone through.  Aside from the open glove compartment, I wouldn't have known the difference from its normal state of disarray.  I've been meaning to clean the van, but I didn't get around to it - sadly, the vandals were not disgusted enough to toss an empty Jamba Juice cup.

I called the police, and two young guys showed up within 15 minutes, after I was dressed (win!) but before I could clean the house (whoops!).  It's always great to have police in your house when you have two empty bottles of wine on the counter and folded laundry all over the couch.  Plus, Audrey immediately hugged one of them around the legs and smiled ("My Friend!") so they got to see that I haven't quite covered Stranger Danger.  At least Sebastian was wearing pants.


Anyway, I discussed the morning's events and then took them out to show the van.  Aaron was still at his appointment, so their supervisor showed up to discuss when and how they could get the report on the iPod.  I looked in to double-check whether anything was missing.  The GPS was inside, the phone charger was still in the car, and I knew the DVD player was empty because I got Wreck-it Ralph out the other day.

Wait...

I checked the stack of loose DVDs that always accumulates when I have to change movies on a trip. Yep, I knew it.  I turned to the policemen.

"Lilo & Stitch is missing.  Dang it..."  I clicked my teeth.  This totally sucked.  I rummaged some more. The Lilo & Stitch DVD case was still in the console.  I opened it to make sure and found the DVD for The Incredibles.  "That's weird.  They didn't take the case!  And they actually left The Incredibles!"

To their credit, both police officers kept a straight face - I was dealing with professionals.  We checked whether anything else had been taken.  There was nothing else.  Even Aaron's CD collection was left untouched on the floor.  We went inside and I filled out my statement about Aaron calling me, what kind of iPod it was, whether there was damage to the cars, and what I found when I checked the van.  While I was writing, the radio dispatch was reporting more thefts on my street - purses, debit cards, wallets, electronics.  They were sending an investigator.

For the next two hours, I had two police cars in front of my house.  They wouldn't take coffee or any other food.  Two more uniformed police officers showed up to talk to Audrey's original two friends and their supervisor.  Three investigators showed up next, in two more vehicles.  I spoke to each person in turn, texting Aaron at the eye doctor, knowing he couldn't read texts with dilated pupils.  I was hoping he wouldn't drive home impaired with the full police force in our front yard.  I was also wondering why someone who breaks into cars in the middle of the night would steal Lilo & Stitch instead of The Incredibles.  I mean, obviously.

The investigator dusted my van for fingerprints.  Audrey walked outside without shoes, carrying three baby dolls.  Sebastian brought a soccer ball.  The neighbor came over to help with the kids.  Aaron came home with his eye doctor glasses on and wrote his statement.

"Well ma'am," the senior investigator said, "It looks like they were just looking for unlocked cars and taking whatever they found.  Not the first time it's happened.  We've got a few more in the neighborhood.  We'll keep your statement on record and keep an eye out for your stuff..."

Of course it was a theft ring.  Of course the larcenists (I hope that's a word) checked every car in the neighborhood for unlocked doors.  I thought about my stupidity at leaving the doors unlocked.  I thought about my sense of security - gone.  I thought about my stuff.  Maybe insurance could cover Aaron's iPod - I hoped our deductible was low enough.  I didn't think there was anything else of value in the van, but now I'd have to buy another copy of Lilo & Stitch and then I'd have an extra case.  Could I recycle that?

I looked at the fingerprint dust on the van, wondering if they had lifted anything, if I needed to be fingerprinted.  Two uniformed officers were leaving and one investigator was getting in his car.  I took in the whole scene - Aaron writing his statement with Audrey's Friends and their supervisor, the remaining investigators talking in the street, one patrol car pulling away.  I looked back at the black dust on my minivan.

That's when it hit me:

I just got robbed and the only thing the thieves found worth stealing in my minivan was a copy of Lilo & Stitch.

Suddenly the big mystery in all of this was: What happened to my life?

I've been robbed, and all they took was a copy of Lilo & Stitch and my self-respect.